Wake Up Before It’s Too Late

I just got another good  lashing from EB. She wants to make certain I’m still awake. It’s 9:04PM Eastern Time. I am chained to the desk, my back covered with the stripes of flagellation. I’ve been beaten raw because the newsletter is not done. I say, “But I’m trying to make this the best newsletter in the world! I put my heart and soul into this. I give our readers their money’s worth and more! I search the deepest parts of the Internet for new things for them.” EB doesn’t listen. Ouch! Another four lashes. I’m beaten down but not defeated. I will never let EB break my spirit.

But alas, EB sits on her throne drinking a gin & tonic with two squeezes of fresh lime awhile I ponder weak and weary over this curious volume of Internet lore. There came a lashing, a real thrashing, as EB makes my backside sore.  I have to get up at 4:00AM to finish this beautiful example of journalistic prose. But I may not hear my alarm clock – because I’m so exhausted. Oh dear, what can I do.

I found the answer. It came to me on the wings of one of EB’s pet bats. The  bat’s wing had a Web site URL on it – it was http://www.wakeupdialer.com/ . They always say you get what you need when you need it if you only have faith the size of a grain of mustard seed. Working for EB – it’s hard to have faith but I do. And Lo the bat flew down and offered me a free wake up call tomorrow so I would not oversleep and face the thumbscrew device that EB keeps in view. She’s only used it once on me – but that disabled me for a week and she had to put out a “review edition” of InfoAve Premium. She will use discretion before she uses the thumbscrew device on me again.

I can say no more. If you want a wake up call tomorrow, and you want to avoid being late for something (keep in mind that you’re not likely to face the wrath of EB) then you’ll want to go set up a free wakeup call for tomorrow morning – or any morning – at WakeupDialer.com. Not only will you get a free wakeup call — you’ll get a marvelous message that will start your day off with a smile.

I can say no more…